


One Hundered Steps Down

by sparkinglovingheart



Series: Loved You Yesterday, Love You Still [5]
Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Age Play, Angst, Bed-Wetting, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fear, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Nightmares, Non-Sexual Age Play, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Hatred, Thumb-sucking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-05
Updated: 2015-09-05
Packaged: 2018-04-19 03:48:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4731776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparkinglovingheart/pseuds/sparkinglovingheart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Hey, kid,” Clint mumbled sleepily. Pietro was gone that night, so it was just him watching her, “Another nightmare, huh?”</p><p>Wanda opened her mouth to answer no it wasn't just that, something was wrong-</p><p>Her hand brushed against the dampness, and the realization hit her like a bullet in the heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Hundered Steps Down

**Author's Note:**

> I think I might have shot myself in the foot writing this? I danced around it, threw around some ideas, repeatedly slammed my face into my computer keyboard, stopped acting like a loser, and finally, I wrote it. I'm terrified of posting it tbh, but there's no going back now.  
> God, I'm terrified.

It had happened exactly three times in recent memory-once at Hydra, twice right before.  
  
Wanda hadn’t really thought about it-the whole thing was so terrible, no matter how much her brother reassured her that it was fine, that she just wanted to push it out of her head. So she told herself that she would be good, that she would never let it happen again. Especially after how Abra had yelled at her when it happened at Hydra. She had been a good woman, but she wasn’t very nice. What Von Strucker did when he found out was even worse.  
  
So after pushing the very idea that it would happen again out of her head, Wanda didn’t realize at first that it _had_ happened again. She had screamed awake, which wasn’t unusual, but her sobs were stifled as soon as she realized something was off. Something was wrong.  
  
“Hey, kid,” Clint mumbled sleepily. Pietro was gone that night, so it was just him watching her, “Another nightmare, huh?”  
  
Wanda opened her mouth to answer no, something was wrong-  
  
Her hand brushed against the dampness, and the realization hit her like a bullet in the heart. Wanda froze in terror, recoiling away from Clint’s touch.  
  
_i tried to be good i tried so hard_  
  
“Wanda,” there was a small amount of concern in his voice, “Hey, what’s the matter?”  
  
“D-don’t touch me,” she choked out.  
  
“What?” now he sounded really worried. Usually Wanda _needed_ to be held, “Do you need me to get your mama?”  
  
“No!” she practically screamed, “Please don’t get her! She’ll hate me!”  
  
Clint was wide awake, “Are you sick?”  
  
“No,” she whimpered, “Just don’t touch me. You’ll hate me too.”  
  
Wanda’s eyes were shut so tightly that she didn’t notice that Clint had gotten up and turned on the light for about a minute. She curled up and choked out sobs until she felt a gentle hand on her face and him saying, “Oh, sweetheart. Shhh, don’t cry, it’s okay.”  
  
_he saw_  
_he knows_  
_no it’s not it’s not it’s not nothing will ever be okay after this_  
  
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, “I’m so sorry.”  
  
“Nothing to be sorry for. Everything’s fine, baby. C’mere,” he helped her to stand on shaky legs, steadying her with his hands on her shoulders, “Wanda, it’s perfectly normal for this to happen to people going through PTSD, especially children.”  
  
“I- I’m sorry, I know I’m bad-”  
  
“No, you’re not. You are not bad. I’m not angry or upset with you at all, okay? It’s no big deal, honey,” he smoothed her hair back and pressed a kiss to her forehead, “Go get in the shower and I’ll take care of this.”  
  
Every moment made it feel like the world was shaking around her. The ground cracking, the sky split open, and everyone, absolutely everyone hating her.  
  
_you are too much trouble you’re too much and they hate you. i hate you. why are you so dumb? you are such an awful, bad girl._  
  
Wanda barely noticed that the water was freezing at first. She let it splash over her, causing her to shiver and blend in with the tear tracks on her face. She wasn’t sure if it felt like a few seconds or an eternity before Clint was there again, stroking her dripping hair, “Sweetheart, you must be freezing.”  
  
Now she really noticed that it was cold and leaned forward so she could hide her face in his shoulder. Clint shut the water off with his free hand and picked her up. She was light, way too light, and almost completely limp as he dried her off and got her dressed again. He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought something like this might happen, but something about the whole situation left him feeling completely unprepared. He tried not to let that on.  
  
“Alright,”  he smiled reassuringly, “You ready to go back to sleep?”  
  
“No.”  
  
“Wanda,” he sighed, “Has this happened before?”  
  
She bit her lip, “I-not since…no!”  
  
He decided not to say, “I know you’re lying to me” and instead just spoke carefully, “Okay, calm down. I was just wondering.”  
  
“I hate myself. I’m so sorry.”  
  
Clint felt his heart ache as he picked her up and held her close. Wanda stiffened for a split second, and then she started to sob hysterically, hands grabbing at Clint’s shirt like it was a life preserver. She was still choking out profuse apologies, although they were hardly understandable. Clint set her on the bed and pulled her close so she was lying on his chest, “It’s okay, princess. Shhh, I’ve got you. I’m here, and I’m not going to let you get hurt.”  
  
“I’m sorry,” she moaned again, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m _such_ a bad girl.”  
  
“No, you’re not. You’re brave, and smart and beautiful. I love you, and I’m not ever going to be mad at you for this, okay? It wasn’t your fault.”  
  
“Yes it was!”  
  
He raised an eyebrow, “How?”  
  
“I don’t know, but it was.”  
  
“Baby, you’ve got to stop blaming yourself for everything. We’ll talk to your brother about it in the morning and-”  
  
“No!” her eyes went wide with panic, “You can’t tell him!”  
  
“I have to. He’s the one who takes care of you.”  
  
“I promise that I won’t do it again!”   


“I think we’ve established that it’s beyond your control. Pietro won’t be upset, Wanda. He loves you too much to get mad at you for anything, much less something like this.”  
 

“Please” she said desperately, “Don’t tell him. I’ll do anything.”  
  
Clint stroked her hair and sighed again. Wanda had put a hell of a lot of trust in him tonight. Maybe there was no reason to break it.  
  
“If it happens again, I’m going to have to tell him. But for now, this can stay between us.”  
 

“Promise?”  
  
“I promise,” he leaned down to kiss her cheek, “Try and get some sleep now.”  
  
She started to relax just a little bit and put her thumb in her mouth,“Can you tell Cinderella?”  
  
“One would think you’d get tired of hearing that after the first billion times. But I guess it’s my job as your fairy godmother.”  
  
Wanda smiled a little bit, “I love you. And you’re the best fairy godmother ever.”  
  
“That’s because I got the best princess ever. And I love you too.”  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Anyways, I don't usually ask for comments, but anyone telling me I didn't do a terrible job on this would be appreciated.


End file.
